Sunday, March 6, 2011

Brain Dump

Have you ever had to do a brain "dump"?
Like, you literally feel as if you can't keep any other pieces of info, opinions, thoughts, and pictures in your mind until you get rid of some stuff?

Hmm, maybe I'm the only one.

So, let me tell you what it's like :)

I feel like I have sooo much stuff jammed up in my brain that if I sneeze, my head will explode - and think an over-ripe tomato hitting a brick wall and splattering everywhere kind of explode :) Got the picture?

My brain files are overflowing and I need to sit down with a pen & a couple notebooks of paper and just write until things are a bit more organized up there. Because if you know anything about me, I go crazy if things are unorganized and cluttered :)

This past weekend I think is what pushed me over the edge.
It was definitely a crazy-emotionally-draining weekend.

It was like, I wanted to smile and be happy - D&I were with family that we never ever see and it was so cool to see & spend time with them all. But then, as my lips were curling up into a smile, I would remember why we were all together : a funeral. A terribly sad occasion, yet at the same time a celebration.

We were sad at our loss - D's Aunt Karen went home one week ago today. She's currently in heaven with her Savior, Jesus Christ. And so, out of jealousy, we mourn and weep that we can no longer have her here with us.
But at the same time, we celebrate, because her body is now healed of cancer. And after fighting the good fight, she beat us all to heaven and is waiting for us there. So, we weep for our loss, but celebrate for heaven's gain.

I could write so much about just the short period of time I got to know her. I remember sitting on D's parent's couch in their living room across from her and her encouraging me - about life. About being married, about the new job I was soon to start, about this season of my life - and always bringing everything back around to Jesus. He was her center. He was her all.

And I know it's cliched, but I definitely want to be like her when I "grow-up".

[Please excuse me while I go find a notebook and continue my brain dump :)]

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